Renting vs Buying: The Hidden Cost of Waiting Too Long to Own a Home
Renting vs Buying: The Hidden Cost of Waiting Too Long to Own a Home
There’s a quiet assumption so many of us carry: that home ownership is something that will happen one day, when the numbers finally make sense. When we earn a little more, save a little more, feel a little more ready. Until then, we rent. It feels responsible. It feels safe. But beneath that decision is a tension we don’t often talk about, the space between what we think we need in order to buy, and what’s actually possible right now.
Because while we’re waiting for the right time, something else is happening in the background: rent keeps rising, property prices keep moving and the gap between where we are and where we want to be quietly widens.
In a recent conversation on The MOMents Podcast with Emarie Campbell from Pam Golding Properties, what emerged wasn’t just practical advice, it was a complete reframing of the renting versus buying conversation, and a powerful reminder that the biggest cost isn’t always what we spend, but what we delay.
Why Renting Feels Safer (Even When It Isn’t)
Renting has an emotional appeal that’s hard to ignore. It feels flexible. Lower risk. Less permanent.
There’s comfort in knowing you’re not tied down. That if something changes, you can move. That you’re not responsible for maintenance or long-term financial commitments. But beneath that sense of safety is a quieter reality: Renting offers no return.
Every payment you make builds someone else’s asset. Every increase in rent chips away a little more of your financial breathing room. And over time, those increases are not small.
In many areas, rental prices climb steadily, often around 10% a year. What feels manageable now becomes noticeably heavier in just a few years. And unlike a bond, which can stabilise over time, rent keeps moving in one direction: up.
So while renting feels like the safer option in the short term, it often creates more financial pressure in the long run.
The Cost You Don’t See
It’s easy to look at buying and focus on the upfront costs like the deposit, the legal fees and the transfer duties. Those numbers are real and they can feel intimidating, but what we don’t often calculate is the long-term cost of not buying.
Imagine paying R20,000 a month in rent. Over a year, that’s R240,000. Over eight years, it’s close to R2 million. And at the end of those eight years, there’s nothing to show for it. No asset. No equity. No financial leverage for your next step.
Now imagine that same period, but instead of renting, you had bought a modest property. Not your dream home, just a starting point.
You would have lived in it, yes. But you also would have been paying into something that belongs to you. And over time, that property may have increased in value, giving you not just a place to live, but a stepping stone forward.
That’s the difference people often miss.
Rent is an expense. Property, even at its most basic, is an investment.
The Real Barrier Isn’t Money. It’s Expectation
One of the most revealing insights from the conversation is that people don’t delay buying because they can’t afford a property. They delay because they can’t afford the property they want.
There’s a quiet but powerful pressure shaping our decisions.
We want to live in certain neighbourhoods. We want our children in certain schools. We want homes that reflect a certain version of success, not just privately, but publicly too. And when those expectations don’t align with our budget, we don’t adjust the plan. We postpone it.
This is where social comparison becomes expensive, because instead of entering the market with what we can afford, we stay on the outside, paying rent, watching prices rise and telling ourselves we’ll start “later.”
ALSO READ: Is Social Media Ruining Your Parenting Experience?
Starting Small Is Not Settling, It’s Strategy
There’s a mindset shift here that changes everything once you really understand it: Your first home is not your forever home.
It’s not meant to tick every box. It’s not meant to impress anyone. It’s meant to get you into the market. That might mean a smaller space. A different area. A home that needs a little work, but what it gives you is momentum.
Because once you own property, time starts working in your favour. Value can grow. Equity can build. Opportunities can open up.
You can sell. Upgrade. Move. But none of that is possible if you never take the first step.
Why Waiting Can Cost You More Than Starting
There’s a common belief that waiting will put you in a better position, that if you just hold off a little longer, you’ll be able to afford more, buy better, live closer to your ideal.
But property doesn’t stand still while you wait. Prices shift. Demand changes. Opportunities move. And often, the gap between what you can afford and what you want doesn’t shrink, it widens.
There’s a reason people say that time in the market matters more than timing the market. Because the earlier you enter, the more time you have on your side.
Waiting doesn’t just delay ownership. It can make it harder to achieve.
ALSO READ: Moms, Stop Going Broke to Prove You’re a Good Parent
For Moms Thinking About the Bigger Picture
If you’re a mom in your 30s or 40s, renting and wondering if it’s too late to make a different decision, it isn’t, but it may require looking at the question differently.
Not “Where do I want to live?” But “What can I realistically invest in right now?”
That shift can feel uncomfortable at first. It may mean moving slightly outside your preferred area. It may mean adjusting expectations, but it also creates stability. A home where your children don’t have to move because a lease ends. A space that belongs to you. A foundation that isn’t dependent on a landlord’s decisions.
And beyond the emotional stability, there’s the long-term impact.
Because owning a home isn’t just about today. It’s about what you’re building over time, for yourself and for your children.
Security, Stability and Choice
Home ownership is not just a financial decision. It’s a life decision. It shapes how stable your environment is. How predictable your expenses are. How much control you have over your future. And perhaps most importantly, it creates options.
Options to sell. To upgrade. To leverage. To pass something on.
Renting, for all its convenience, doesn’t offer the same. It offers flexibility, but very little in the way of long-term security.
A Different Way to Think About It
Maybe the goal isn’t to buy the perfect home. Maybe the goal is simply to start. To step into the market in a way that feels manageable, even if it’s not ideal, because the real cost isn’t always in what you spend. Sometimes, it’s in what you delay.
And over time, that cost adds up quietly, until one day, you realise it’s been shaping your future all along.
Watch the full episode here:
0:00
Challenging the Money Myth in Home Ownership
If you’ve ever said I’ll buy a house one day when I can afford it, this episode might make you think twice.
Because what if the problem isn’t actually money?
What if the real barriers are things we never talk about, like big expectations, social pressure, or the fear of buying something that doesn’t look impressive enough?
0:24
The truth is, many people could actually afford to get into the property market far earlier than they think.
Today, we’re looking at the costs that aren’t on your bank statement because sometimes the biggest obstacle to home ownership isn’t the bank, it’s the story we’re telling ourselves.
0:46
Joining me is Emory Campbell.
She’s the managing director of Pam Golding in Bloomberg, and she has almost 40 years of experience in the property market.
Welcome, Emery.
0:58
Speaker 2
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
1:00
Speaker 1
So you’ve seen it all.
You deal with people buying and selling homes everyday.
You’ve been in this game for decades.
In your experience, if money isn’t the real problem or always the problem, what is actually stopping people from buying their first homes?
1:20
Speaker 2
Marriage.
I think the majority of people would like to own their own home.
They just think that they’re not in a position to do so yet.
And I myself, as you clearly must work out and past retirement age.
1:37
But there’s so much that is still very active in it.
And I think myself when I was 25 or 30, he could hardly afford to rent a property back in the late 70s, early 80s.
So.
So home ownership is something you want, but as a single person, very few people actually make that commitment.
2:00
And then they find their partner and they get engaged.
Or they live together and then they get married.
And then they start thinking about the future.
But many people think about the future without actually putting their feet flat on the ground.
2:21
What can we afford now?
They saw, as we discussed when I had a chat to you the other day, the majority of people they want to hang with, their community is where the school is, where their friends are.
2:36
And very often they can only afford to rent that and not buy it.
So all of a sudden one day they wake up and they are 40 years old and they still aren’t.
2:49
Understanding the Real Barriers to Home Ownership
Whereas if they bought when they were 30, half the bond would have been paid by the time they were 40.
So it’s a decision that is based on commitment and how badly you want.
It’s not always money because you buy a small property to start off with.
3:06
Speaker 1
Yeah, that’s true.
So do you think people are confusing the status that comes from living in a certain neighborhood with long term strategy?
3:19
Speaker 2
I absolutely do.
I mean, let’s, let’s just use a suburb here in our area.
So when I first came to the western seaboard in 1999, the first few houses in Sunningdale were just getting built.
3:36
And there they were running along the highway and they were kind of between those power lines and R-27.
And I think entry level was around about, uh, probably 100 and 250 three 100,000 for one of those small 2 bedroom units.
3:56
Today entry level in Sunningdale for a new unit is 44 N million.
You can buy a second hand older one close to the highway for 2 million but everybody wants the 4 million Rand one and that’s what stops them from buying.
4:15
So then they rent because their mates have a three bedroomed one with a bright area and a pool.
So that’s what I want.
So I spend 40,000 Rand a month on read.
I could be paying a bond.
4:29
Speaker 1
Yeah.
4:31
Speaker 2
So there’s pressure.
4:32
Speaker 1
Yeah, there’s so much pressure and I think too many people are not necessarily educated enough or we don’t know.
We don’t learn these things in school and I don’t think many people actually seek out enough advice and many other people are renting so they think that’s fine to do it.
4:56
So why?
Why are they still the conception that renting is safer even when it doesn’t build long term security?
5:09
Speaker 2
The you know, I have friends that are good friends of mine and they, I don’t know if it’s an affordability issue, but they definitely believe that you don’t get the return on your money and property prices don’t go up enough.
5:26
But that is absolutely not true because what people do not understand, if you bought that property in Sunningdale eight years ago for 2 million, you would have loved it for eight years.
5:44
The Pressure of Social Expectations
So normally you would have paid rent.
Not eight years later you have the property.
The capital appreciation is now probably up to three and a half million if you sell it.
5:59
But you’ve also loved me.
So if you take the rent, even if it’s 20,000 Rand a month and even if it didn’t go up, it’s 240,000 Rand a year, you multiply that by 8, you have blown at least one and a half million on rate.
6:19
Did you get absolutely no return?
Nothing.
It’s gone.
It’s paid off someone else’s mortgage, it’s paid off the landlords mortgage and the landlords got the appreciation.
6:35
So you’ve paid his mortgage and the house is now worth 3 and a half million?
6:40
Speaker 1
And he paid off the mortgage and he’s also when he sells, he sells with such a big profit.
6:49
Speaker 2
Yeah, so, so I think for young people, um, especially if you factor your, your stages through life, you have kids today probably around about 28 to 34 is a, is a sort of a more normalised area.
7:08
People don’t have children that young anymore.
So if you buy, if you if you start having kids at 28 to 30, you don’t have to create anyway move into a three bedroom time.
You can buy an apartment for two, four with two bedrooms.
By the time you have your second kid, you saw that apartment and you scale up and then you get the the property with the three bedrooms because you would have had capital growth.
7:34
And I don’t know when people are gonna get on the property ladder if they don’t start soon because by the time you are 55, your mortgage should be paid because the last 10 years of your life should be for your retirement.
7:57
And it can start off by buying a one bedroom apartment and then have children.
Maybe they can even share a bedroom while they’re little and then sell that.
Get some money thin by the two bed or the three bed.
8:17
Yeah, but it’s I see so many fancy cars and issue these popped outside our private schools on the western seaboard.
8:28
Navigating the Property Market: Practical Steps
And I just wonder how many of those people are ringing.
Yeah, because all that happens with that car, it depreciates in value, but it looks good.
8:39
Speaker 1
Yeah, so that the whole core and lifestyle aspect of things brings me to my next question, which is all about societal perspectives and the pressure to keep up with the Joneses and the comparison culture we all trapped in on social media.
8:58
So is all of that distorting our expectations of what a first home should look like?
9:09
Speaker 2
Absolutely, absolutely.
I, I think sometimes our value system is, as you say, it’s very social media orientated.
How do I look not what am I and and where is this going to take me?
9:24
But today my observation is I want to live in the right place.
I want to be my kids have to be at the right school.
I need to be fashioned forward.
I need to have the, the, the, the nice car.
9:42
All those things depreciate, whereas the people who make these solid investments in the beginning cut their coats according to their class.
In 10 years time, their world is far less stressed, far more stable for their children and their relationship has less pressure on it.
10:06
Because one thing that is a reality and I see it in my rental division, the rainbows are going up on average 10% per annum.
When you’re ready to renew your lease because of the stock shortage, the rentals are going up by approximately 10%.
10:24
So if you’re paying 40,000 Rand a month now, next year you’re going to pay 44,000 Rand amount, and the year after you’re gonna pay 48,500.
The bond repayment stays the same and this interest rates go up, but we are now in a cycle where our economy is very stable and over the last 18 months I think we’ve dropped three percentage points.
10:54
So people’s boundary payments have actually reduced, whereas if you’re on the treadmill of rentals just goes up.
11:04
The Importance of Early Investment in Property
Yeah, that’s a very scary reality for many people.
So when people say just get into the market, what does that mean in practical terms?
Does it mean buying a place where you can live with your family?
11:21
Or does it mean just get like a bachelor flat justice just you have property on your name?
11:27
Speaker 2
So, so yes, my thoughts, if you, if you are a 40 year old person and you have you’re married with two kids, you are more than likely going to want to buy a three bedroom property.
11:42
So maybe you don’t buy the property in Sunningdale.
Maybe you buy the property in the wine lands?
Will you buy the property in table view?
And then you fix that, tidy it up, stay there for three or four years?
12:02
Who cares if you live in the winelands or in table view?
Cause you’re actually investing in your asset and when you decide to sell it you’re gonna make a couple of 100,000 if not a million and then you are 5045 or 46 years old and then you upgrade into the next property.
12:23
But a lot of people don’t buy because they want to live there, but they can’t afford to live there.
So they must reverse a little bit, bought where they can afford, make it their home, improve it after a couple of years, flip it.
12:42
And remember, you’re allowed to make now a 3,000,000 Rand profit on a sale without paying capital gains tax, so you’re not taxed on that increase you get on your original investment.
13:01
Speaker 1
Okay.
And that’s very interesting.
I think there are other other things that people are also careful for when they’re buying for the first time, all the hidden costs that comes with the purchase of a home, like the transfer duties or the agent rates.
13:22
Speaker 2
The transactional costs.
So first of all, the seller pays the Commission.
Okay, so the buyer does not pay the Commission.
The Commission is included in the selling price and the seller pays that.
But I had a quick look here and it’s our property for let’s start off with one and a half million.
13:42
Your transfer and registration costs are gonna be 50,000 Rand.
13:48
Hidden Costs of Home Buying
Okay, and if and your mortgage costs are gonna be another, your bond registration costs are gonna be another 37,000, right?
So you gotta have another 100,000 K and it’s very likely that you should be able to get a bond for at least 80 to 90% today.
14:11
Your bond repayment cannot exceed more than 1/3 of what you earn, your gross earnings, earnings.
And I are strongly recommend that people who are thinking of going into buying a property speak to a mortgage originator.
14:31
We personally have a lady called Helen who’s been with me.
I’ve had this business for 26 years.
Yeah, in Bluebird and Helen’s been with me for 20 years.
You go to a mortgage originator, she’s with Uber.
They pre qualify.
14:48
Can you know exactly what you can spend and she will tell you You’ll qualify for a mortgage of 2 million.
You’re gonna need ex amount for costs so I’ll give you a put pre approval certificate and you can go shopping.
15:06
OK, so you don’t have to go in the Sunday show day and not know whether you can or can’t afford this property.
You they voted property at 24 and then you then you shop in your price range because, because you’re gonna spend that 90,000 rent if you spend one and a half million, okay.
15:27
If you spend, if you’re back with 3 million, you are gonna spend on your transfer costs 164,000, your registration costs and that includes the transfer duty that includes the attorneys everything and your mortgage for that is another 57.
15:47
You’re gonna be in there for 225,000.
15:50
Speaker 1
Okay.
15:52
Speaker 2
Just to put that properly in your name.
15:54
Speaker 1
Yeah.
15:55
Speaker 2
But again, if you’re a married couple and you look, you can get quite a high mortgage, so you need a 20% deposit.
So you’re probably in this journey here.
Not 10 to 20%.
16:10
If you have 500,000 RAT available, including your costs, you would be able to buy a property for about 3 million if your and your husband’s income is setting at around about um 70,000 Rand joint income.
16:35
Market Timing: When to Buy
So Emery, is the current market a reason to wait or a reason to move and get out there and purchase your first property?
16:46
Speaker 2
Okay, so yes, the bad news for the people who think they can wait.
The reality is supply and demand determine price.
16:57
Speaker 1
Okay.
16:58
Speaker 2
We’ve had an influx of semi grants coming in here in this price range that the western seaboard is in.
And then of course, luxury.
We’re not even talking about the luxury homes in the estates where foreigners are buying and wealthy, wealthy people are coming from.
17:16
But just enter kit.
Go foot into the market, test kit into a property.
Remember at 55 your mortgage should be pretty much paid up.
17:31
So did you can retire and not have that added extra worry about where my going to live?
17:40
Empowering Future Generations through Home Ownership
Yeah, that’s very, very good advice.
So now I’m wondering for someone listening, a mom with two kids whose renting and she’s in her late 30s or 40 or 40s, what should she be doing right now if she’s not a home owner at the moment or yet?
18:03
Speaker 2
I think the first thing she must do is either contact Helen at Uber or if she wants to contact any other mortgage originator that she knows and she must find out what she can afford and what is possible for her.
18:19
Once she does what what created or what mortgage she would qualify for.
She then asked to scour the property 24 private property, Pam Golding websites, etcetera.
Because you can shop online without having to walk into any of our offices and feeling pressured.
18:37
Success.
Acquaint yourself with the inventory that is online and then again, if you don’t want to be pressured, you can just kind of visit a show day to get an idea of an area.
18:54
But if you have to step out of the area you are in at the moment and slightly downgrade to a neighboring area, it’s not a downgrade socially.
It’s an upgrade personally because you now own your home and the rain’s not gonna go up by 10% and you’re going to have a capital appreciation.
19:18
So that’s the pressure we spoke about in the beginning, where people have this feeling of keeping up with each other instead of sense and sensibility landing.
19:29
Speaker 1
Yeah, and the other day you said it so well when we were planning this episode, you said people have champagne taste on a beer budget.
I love that quote.
19:44
Speaker 2
It’s true.
It’s absolutely true.
You know when they want their champagne, they could only afford to buy it by the glass.
They can’t afford to buy by the bottle.
Okay, Which means don’t drink it.
Just just have some good old shade and blank.
20:03
Speaker 1
So I think the way you put it in perspective that by a certain age you need to start thinking about retirement and what you’re going to do when you stop working and stop earning your monthly salary.
And that is very important in the long term because you don’t wanna be renting so when you’re 70 years old.
20:31
Speaker 2
Ohh, you know, I had a very enlightening experience last year.
I matriculated in 1975.
That’s a very long time ago and we had our metric reunion and in the Eastern Cape and off our weight and I’m still working and I think I’ll probably work for another 5-6, seven years, who knows, because I find myself active and motivated and I still have a purpose.
21:04
But what really saddened me is when I saw some of my school mates and they were and we all hugging 70.
Let’s put it that way.
We all hugging 70 that that worked in an environment where they were retired at the age of 6365 and and their journey has forced them to sell their properties and to rent or to go into stuff that they never ever thought in their life they would have to love like that after all these years.
21:40
And it was such a wake up call for me because in my daily world I deal with people that are similar to me and in my work environment at Pam Golding and we all moving forward and to suddenly be exposed.
And they were about 42 of us from Amatrice class.
21:58
But I felt so sad for people when that they weren’t as lucky as what I am.
And you don’t realise that when you’re 30 and when you’re 40.
But it was such an awakening for me.
22:15
Speaker 1
Yeah, that’s a very harsh reality to be faced with that we want to avoid.
22:21
Speaker 2
Yeah.
22:22
Speaker 1
When we get to that age.
22:24
Speaker 2
We do, yeah.
And and that’s we’re living now for that age.
So it’s just to to keep up with the Joneses now will the Jones is gonna be so I can only say to to people today that that get your priorities right.
22:43
Start small and slowly grow and own your own home.
Do not be at the mercy of increasing rentals and no capital growth.
22:58
Speaker 1
That’s such, such good advice, Emery.
So one more question.
I always say we don’t really talk about the kids on this podcast because it’s all about the moms.
But I, I do wanna bring the kids in here now wonders home ownership mean in the long term for our children’s future And what should be what should we be teaching them about home ownership?
23:26
Like I said at the beginning, it’s like we don’t have the right information and no one taught us or or educated us about home ownership.
What responsibility sits with us to teach our children and to give them the legacy or the freedom or the choice that many people my age didn’t have when we were in our early 20s?
23:54
Speaker 2
Think the first thing home ownership does is create stability in our family.
Secondly, if you own something, you’d take care of it and you are responsible.
So straight away they will see the mum cleaning, cleaning, cleaning, they’ll see her working in the garden, the dad will do the maintenance because this is something you own.
24:20
But it’s the stability of home ownership where the landlord can’t give you notice where you can spend as long as your parents decide you will stay in that home and it’s their home, It’s, you are not going to not have your lease renewed and move again and move again.
24:42
And you know, moving is also expensive.
I, I consider myself to be very fortunate.
I grew up on a farm in the Eastern Cape and I only ever knew one home and, and my children also when I, I lived in Johannesburg and then I was transferred to Cape Town.
25:04
And my children have also loved in the, when I moved from Joburg to Cape Town for 18 years in exactly the same home.
And that is OHH, what memories are when they went to university and eventually, um, I lived in Newlands for 18 years and my business was here.
25:26
I then moved here to Big Bay and I bought a plot, then bought a house, one of the estates.
But then I was already that was 10 years ago when I was when I was 55 years old.
Ohh.
I’m gonna live there, I hope, God willing for another kind of seniors, but home ownership for a child is stability.
25:51
Speaker 1
No, that’s very, very important.
25:54
Speaker 2
And there’s something if it’s a leak.
It is also an if something happens to you and, and you pass away or there’s, there’s an asset that can be left to the tolling.
26:09
Whereas when you’ve been paying years and years of rent and you pass on, there’s nothing.
No, it’s nothing.
26:19
Speaker 1
John, that’s a lot to think about.
What can we teach our children about when to buy, how to buy, how to get into the market?
26:32
Speaker 2
So I, I think when you were there the other day, I told you we have quite a big green top portfolio.
We have over 400 leases and we encourage kids that have just left a university when they looking for their first rental, they very often don’t qualify on their own but we encourage their debt at or their mum or a family member to go on the lease with them so that they can start up a responsible credit profile.
27:00
So from the age of 2425, you need to set that up because by the time you speak to Helen from Uber, you already can show that you have been renting for two or three years.
You’ve paid for your cell phone and then she looks at you along with your pay slip and you start thinking about owning your own property.
27:23
The younger you start thinking about that and it doesn’t matter.
We call them cupboards because they’re so.
27:29
Speaker 1
Small are cute.
27:31
Speaker 2
You can buy a 36 year a 36 square metre studio apartment for for 800,000 and your boundary payments gonna be maybe 10,000 Rand but it’s.
27:46
Speaker 1
Yours no.
27:48
Speaker 2
So, and that’s what people don’t wanna do.
They want a bigger property, they want to be on the beach front, they want to view and they’ll pay 15,000 in a month rate instead of owning them.
28:00
Speaker 1
Yeah, Emory, thank you so, so much for joining me and for sharing all this invaluable information with us.
I’m sure you’ve given me and so many other moms a lot to think about and very, very practical advice to follow, and I’m so grateful that you’ve shared it all with us and I’m sure it’s going to help a lot of people.
28:26
Speaker 2
And if anybody wants to talk to me, I’m, I’m available.
I love seeing young people getting into home ownership because they are our future.
Well done to you for creating this awareness amongst your peers that’s really necessary.
28:42
Speaker 1
Thank you, Emily.
I really appreciate that.
Wow, Emory has really given us so much to think about.
Buying a home is about building something slowly.
It’s about stability and security and a future.
29:00
Your first house might not be perfect and it might need a few layers of paint, but property has always rewarded one thing more than anything else.
Time in the market.
And maybe the real mindset shift is this.
29:17
Stop trying to buy the house that proves something to everyone else and start buying the one that quietly changes your future.
The goal is getting into the market and creating options for yourself and your family.
29:33
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